cognitive dissident

We can thank the late George Carlin not only for his immortal "Seven Dirty Words" (here's the Wikipedia article and a YouTube clip from 1978) but myriad other classics over a long and celebrated career. In 2004, Comedy Central rated Carlin the second-best stand-up comedian ever, behind Richard Pryor and just ahead of Lenny Bruce.

I was fortunate enough to see Carlin live in concert several years ago, not long after his "Complaints and Grievances" CD was released in the immediate aftermath of 9/11. (I would have written this post sooner, but I had to listen to his routine again and transcribe a few bits.) Carlin had this to say about dissent over the invasion of Afghanistan (before Bush gave up hunting bin Laden and went after Saddam Hussein instead):

Here's the way it works: The primate brain says, "Give peace a chance." The mammalian brain says, "Give peace a chance, but first let's kill this motherfucker." And the reptilian brain says, "Let's just kill the motherfucker, go the peace rally, and get laid."

Carlin excoriated parents who plaster their cars with those "My child is an honor student" bumper stickers:

Here's a bumper sticker I'd like to see: "We are the proud parents of a child whose self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn't need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car."

Or: "We are the proud parents of a child who has resisted his teacher's attempts to break his spirit and bend him to the will of his corporate masters."

Here's something realistic: "We have a daughter in public school who hasn't been knocked up yet."

"We have a son in public school who hasn't shot any of his classmates yet...but he does sell drugs to your honor student. Plus, he knocked up your daughter."

(I don't hear the names "Todd" and "Tucker" in quite the same way any more, either.)

Thanks for all the laughs, George...even Thomas the Tank Engine sucked a little bit less when you did the narration.